FILE STABILIZING // BOUCLÉ FUTURES MARKET FALLS 12% FOLLOWING UPHOLSTERY INCIDENT // MINISTRY APPROVES TWO NEW SHADES OF BEIGE AFTER EXTENSIVE REVIEW // TRANSMISSION PENDING // EDISON BULB OUTBREAK DECLARED ENDLESS // GATSBY COSPLAY INCIDENTS UP 38% THIS QUARTER // ARCHIVE RESOLVING // AUTHORITIES STILL SEEK DEFINITION OF "VINTAGE" // INSTAGRAM CONCUSSION NOW CONSIDERED PRE-EXISTING CONDITION //